Thanks Wendy- I had all of those and puzzled about several James McDonalds from PEI, but none fit. Nor several James Josephs from London 1864, which a possible relative swears must be the one(s). However I have tracked all of these people to other marriages and/or deaths. Pretty sure it is the Victorian chap whose father married a 14-year-old Jane Kay from Northumberland.
I am related to James Joseph and don't know anymore but I have DNA matched to someone in PEI. I am hoping by helping her, I can shed some light on this. I will look into the john James possibility. It is a real mystery and I really appreciate all help.